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the A STUDENT NEWSPAPER OF NEW COLLEGE OF FLORIDA ALYST VOLUME XVI ISSUE 10 APRIL 23, 2003 Heiser leaves ''shoes to fill'' Twenty-four years as New College Foundation President secures his legacy. Now, the Foundation must search for a successor. by Sarah Stamper 'There i no way that New College would be here today at all, I don't think, without General Heiser," Dean of Students Mark Blaweiss said when asked about General Rolland V. Heiser's impact on New Co11ege. After 24 years of ervice as New Co11ege Foundation presiden4 Hei er is retiring. The New College administration is working through the transition from Hei er' legacy to a new age for the New College Foundation. The man behind the institution support New College by serving on the Board of Governors. In this powerful position, "I will certainly be alert to the interests of New College," he aid. ew Col1ege staff are quick to acknowledge the prestige of Heiser' new position. ew College Alumnae/i A ociation Director David Bryant said, "He i a legend around here. I am very glad that he wi11 be able to help us out on the Board of Governors In between raising fund for new building and battling USF over campu management Hei er never lo t sight of the rea on why he was the tudents. "Basically, I am retiring because after 24 years we have achieved all of General Rolland V Heiser and wife Gwenne look pensively to the future, at a the goals I established, and it ts time ceremony Apr. 17. Heiser is set to step down from his position as New Colleg-=... e ........ ==-=,;:nc:;..ow to set our for th(" future school. Heiser said. He plans on continuing to He took substantial time to meet with students, and even occasionally dined at Sodexho to get a feel for the campus morale. "In addition to his Novo Collegians, pro-life locals face of IOU C DIC 0 by Christopher DeFillippi While the drably colored Sara ota Women's Health Center doe not usually attract much attention amid t the bright pink stucco of Sarasota, sometimes group of over twenty ocial activist gather out ide the building between the hours of eight and noon each Friday. It is this time of the week that the Health Cen ter performs abortior. With the pro-life activi t being overwhelmingly nonde nominational Chri tian, the attendance of protestors was unusually high the week of Good Friday, the second most holy day in the Christian calendar. At about 8:45 a.m. on April 18, Scott and Cathy Heldrekh and their six children, piled out of their minivan and tood by the back entrance of the Sarasota Women's Health Center. The married couple, who have shown up at the Center on intermittent Friday morning for four years, are oon joined CATALYST this week 4.23.2003 by other married couples. their children, friends, and neighbors. Over a dozen children run about giggling, contrasting starkly with the relatively omber demeanor of the adults. A son of Heldrekh 's holds up a sign with the picture of the Gerber baby and text "Abortion is murder," while shaking it in the air and giddily making gunfire noises. Relatively new at the Center are a group of New College students, predominately members of campus feminist organizations, who show up holding placards to show support for the people who have chosen abortion. "It wa a Vox ( campu affiliate of Planned Parenthood) and [Feminist Majority Leadership Alliance] thing," frequent rally attendee and fir t-year Lee Johnson said 'Both ide were pretty active in helping put it together." The rally demon trator although not working for the Sarasota Women's Fishbowl flooded Racism, war and the hope for peace were all discussed at the April 15 Teach-In that brought both speakers and listeners from campus and the community. Story page 3 Health Center, are working with Director France Parrill's expres approval. 'The parents fmd it comforting to ee some people on their side," said Parrill. Members speaking on behalf of both the pro-life protestors and the student demon trators stated repeatedly that they concerned themselves predominately with affecting the lives of the individuals entering the Health Center, a oppo ed to bringing about change through directly influencing politic The pro-life protestor shouted out to people entering the building that there were alternatives to abortion. "(Typical pro-life activi ts] don't view it as changing the hearts of the individual mother ,"Scott Heldrekh said. 'They look at legally changing abortion laws a a solution ... If we put criminal charge on abortionist today, it wouldn t change the hearts of the people." Members of the pro-choice support continued on page 4 I Pro-choice protestors stand and offer support to women entering the clinic. Bowling for Dortstein From Roman slave boys to Michael Moore (really Casey Burns, left), next year's RAs are an eclectic bunch. But, just what does Gabriel want to do with buffalo wing ? Story page 8


The Catal st CONTENTS Rather than feeding our reader mindless fluff, and in an effort to maintain our dignity as writers and editors, this issue has been cut to eight action-packed pages for your reading enjoyment. DAY WEATHER Today: Partly cloudy, 79/61 Thursday: Sunny, 8x/65 Friday: Isolated T-Storms, 82/67 Saturday: Scattered T-Storms, 82/68 Sunday: Scattered Showers, 8r/65 Monday: T-Storms, 83/66 Thesday: Mostly Sunny, 83/65 M.t ASSIGNMENTS Friday: David Higgins/Alex Hague "Bacc That Ass Up" Saturday: Megan Cleaver "The Red Carpet Wall" the CATALYST Copynr,ht 11k Cuta v.t. All n reser\'ed GENERAL EDITOR Michael Gimignani MANAGING EDITOR Sarah Zell DESICN EDITOR Caitlin Youac PHOTO EDITOR Nathaniel Burbank ONUNE EDITOR Sydney Nash SEHIOR STAFF WRITERS Abby ... ingarlen Michael Sanderson STAFF WRITERS Christopher Defillippi Maria lopez Katelyn Weissinger Josh Orr Sarah Stamper Erin Marie Blasco The Catalyst i an academic tutorial sponsored by Professor Maria Vesperi. It is in the New College Publications Office u ing Adobe Photo shop and Quark X press for PowerMacintosh and printed at the Bradenton I Ierald with money provided by the ew C'..ollege Student Alliance. Direct submissions and inquiries to: The Catalyst 5700 N Tamiami 1r Box #75 Sara ota, FL 34243 catalyst@ncfedu (941) 359-4266 The Catalyst reserves the right to edit submissions for space grammar or style No anonymous submissions will be accepted See contribution guidelines for further information. All submissions must be received by 5:00 p m. Saturday in order to appear in the following week's issue. Information about upcoming events welcome throughout the week. Visit The Catalyst online at : :1/ st ON CAMPUS by Maria Lopez Lounge renovations continue Second Court lounge has been fully renovated The bathroom door has been fixed, a new toilet has been installed and a new air conditioning system should be operational in the near future. The wall which separates Second Court lounge and the laundry room has been sealed off so that the lounge may be locked up by the campus police while keeping the laundry area accessible to students. The process began when third-years Veronica Fannin and Tina Gardiakos decided to undertake the project for their 2003 Independent Study Project. Additional furniture could be added to the lounge, which may be purchased new through Southwest Contract, a company that provides New College with dorm and office furniture. However, Coordinator of Residential Facilities Keith Yannessa recommends purchasing from consignment shops for a more cozy appearance at a fraction of the price. Third Court lounge renovations are al s o underway The NCSA Residence Life Committee has been working with the Residence Life Office on plans to get new air conditioning, add a drop ceiling, resurface the floor, and repaint the walls. A plumber has been appointed to remove and replace the piping. In addition, Third Court lounge will have a new sink and countertop. Director of Residential Life and Food Service Mike Campbell said the Third Court lounge will show a significant improvement. The lounge should reopen in the fall. All lounge renovation have been funded by the housing budget. Matola lectures on Belize Zoo On April 15, New College Alum Sharon Matola (entered '73) gave a lecture at Selby Gardens on her work at the Belize Zoo. Matola organized the facility in 1983 with animals used in wildlife documentaries about tropical forests. The zoo has flourished since. The zoo is located on 29 acres of tropical savanna, and has 125 animals indigenous to Belize. About 10,000 students visit the zoo annually. In the Adopt-an-Animal program, supporters are encouraged to make a donation to help support an animal of their choice. For $35 supporters can sponsor a gray fox, paca, or contimundi. One hundred dollars will sponsor a jaguar, spider monkey, or puma. Ladies Who Lynch In the Sudakoff Conference Center on April 17, Boston College History Professor Crosley plans moving along bySarahZeU A USF Board of Trustees workgroup at the main campus in Tampa unanimously supported USF Sarasota/Manatee's pro posed development of the 28-acre portion of the Crosley E tate on Friday April 17. The USF Sarasota/Manatee campus board will meet to discuss and likely approve the Master Plan Update in May, with the plan going to the USF trustees a few days later. If approved, the plan will allow the university to begin a development agreement with the host government required by Florida education facilities statutes. This agreement will sort out problems like zoning, gopher tortoise conservation or reloca tion, and habitat conservation. Following several months of public comment, the University announced amendments to por tions of the master plan, and said it will continue to work with gov ernment agencies to solidify the most ecologically and socially conscious plan possible. pus from its current location This has been a long-standing point of contention with New College as 2001 legislation providing for the college's independence from USF also mandated that USF Sara sota/Manatee relocate. In a November interview with The Catalyst, USF Sarasota/Man atee CEO Laurey Stryker indi cated the university would con tinue to utilize shared facilities such as Sudakoff Conference Center and Cook Library in addi tion to classroom space. A Joint Relocation and Use Plan between the two institutions was signed Jan. 17 to clarify the boundaries of USF's shared use, and the uni versity indicated that these changes are evident in the amended plan 2003 Crystal Feimster read from her d i ss ertation 'Ladie s Who Lynch : Race, Sex and Power in the New South Approximately 40 students and Sarasotans attended The Diversity and Gender Cente r spon s ored the reading Feimster discussed women's participation in mob violence, specifically lynching. Slides shown depicted frightening images of public hangings, where many gathered beneath trees and on bridges to watch vigilante justice as it happened. Feimster told the audience that lynching participants would often attend these events dressed in their "Sunday best" and bring along their children. Although southern racism in the late 1800s was one general cause for the lynchings, white women were often lynched as well. When white women were lynched, it was usually because others believe d they were prostitutes, or unchaste. Feimster also said that white men justified the lynching of black men by taking a claim to "protect white womanhood." Recently USF Sarasota/Mana tee altered the language of the doc ument to reflect the "relocation" of the Sarasota/Manatee campus as opposed to "growing'' of the camConcern of local citizensimpacts on the Uplands neighbor hood located between the current shared campus and the Crosley Estate, and the environmentwere heard at three separate pub lic hearings. The questions and statements taken as public record have not yet produced changes as drastic as New College's concern over campus management. Information from the Bradenton Herald was used in this report. . .. .. ... .,1 .. a.. t


The Catalyst NEWS April 23, 2003 Teach-In brings multifaceted discussion of war by Caitlin Young The Hamilton Center Fi hbowl was flooded April 15 with students and community members interested in discrimination, peaceful resistance, and how to deal with the repercussions of the war on Iraq. Nearly 1 00 people showed up to hear the speakers including community leaders, professors and students. The event was organized by fourth-year Robin Jacobs. The speakers all agreed to come for free, though the SAC did provide money for snacks and flyers. In general, the Teach-In was about how the American war on Iraq-and even before that the Sept. 11 incident has made significant impacts on domestic and foreign fronts. The event also tackled the serious discrimination and legal harassment Muslims and Arabs are facing in the U.S. Recent disregard of international opinion has set a disturbing precedent, causing some to ask the question of who polices the U.S. Additionally, Amnesty International is looking into allegations that the U.S. has been committing war crimes, but is not stepping forward to prosecute those involved. Current generalizations "devastating effect on Arabs Muslims in this community," said speaker Nina Burwell, former president of the Interfaith and Interracial Council of Sarasota and Manatee Counties. She currently works with an at-risk youth group called "Yes We Can." Discrimination against Arabs and Muslims is an ever-growing problem. Burwell cited many examples of racial hate, and called for people to realize that what they're doing is unfounded and wrong. "Why do we single out people who are easily separated out by appearance?" Burwell asked. Arabs and Mu lims "came here for what the American flag stands for: democracy." What they get now is hatred, according to Burwell. She also pointed out that minorities cannot mobilize and voice their opposition to the war because they fear repercussions. "If you live in a society where there's so much distrust that you never know if INS is going to be waiting for you when you leave the store, you can't afford to come out to events like this," she said. "It's dangerous." Non-violent soulforce Many students had met Reverend Don Thompson before. Most recently he was part of the sit-in at Sarasota-based Congresswoman Katherine Harris' office. He has been active in non-violent protest since 1965, when he studied under Dr. Martin Luther King. Thompson wa dressed in a blue shirt with the traditional clerical collar and holding Stride Forwards by King in the same manner as a preacher holds a Bible. His message was for "non violent soulforce," which he defined as different from pacifism. It's "a soul spirit force to make change," according to Thompson. It's about ubmitting yourself to possible physical harm or arrest because you oppose that which is unjust." First-year Gustavo Oliveira asked what Thompson thought could be done in the current situation. "We were not able to stop the Iraq war," Thompson replied, "and we may not be able to stop the Syria war, but we have to deal with this massive greed, militarism and racism." Thompson urged students to get involved with electing politicians and keeping them on the right track once they're in office. He charged many politicians with being "Dixie-crat Democrats," or nearly the same as Republicans. He highlighted his grandmother, the first woman elected to the New Jersey legislature, as an upstanding example of honest "Who's going to take us to task?'' third-year Gigi Shames asked Travis McArthur, a student representative from Amnesty International. He was there to touch on a few points about international law, specifically the Geneva Convention of 1949, but was unable to come up with any real answers. Over 4,000 civilians have been killed due to cluster bombs from the Gulf War. Use of the bombs is considered a war crime because it causes "superfluous civilian deaths." Charges have been made that the U.S. is using cluster bombs in Iraq. There have also been allegations that U.S. attacks on Iraqi media have been improper and were in an effort to keep local news from being broadcast. The civilian situation in Traq is in chaos. Looting is widespread, Red Cross supplies in ho pitals are being stolen, and army distribution of food is not getting back to women and children. "What's becoming increasingly clear is that the humanitarian situation in Iraq is dire," McArthur said. There was a table set up in the back of the Fishbowl with information and pre-written letters of opposition to U.S. Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld for people to sign. Student Interpretations Local voices were added by thesis student Casey Burns and third-year Ben Wright. Burns spoke first, adding analysis as a political science major. One of the most remarkable things, according to Bums, is the Bush admimstration's ability to completely change what people care and talk about. Additionally, they have brought the issues and vocabulary down to the lowest common denominator, making argument nearly impossible, he said. "It's good versus evil now. You can't say 'yeah, I'm pro-evil,'" Bums joked. The new trategy of ''shock and awe" campaigns is "sort of the blitzkrieg of the modern era," he said. ''We just beat up on a third world country that never really put up a fight." While first-year Blake Weinger said that Burns was "seriously underestimating the serious resistance in this country," Bums rebutted that "the majority of the students are like the majority of the country. It's not that they don't care, it's that the rhetoric has worked so well." Wright looked at the situation through a sociological lens. He analyzed the current administration, and how in many ways it's just a continuation of the first Bush regime. Wright's resentation was marked m. community members. Sarasota resident George Arvay spoke up in defense of Wright and called for no more interruptions. Arvay, originally from Hungary and having lived for everal years under both Nazi and Communi t rule, in erted several comment throughout the evening. He cited many historical situations and mentioned how the present is beginning to show frightening similarities. Nathaniel Second-year Ben Wright was one of two students who spoke. A Historical Look The history of war and the Middle Eastern region was History Professor Lee Synder's topic. He also philosophized about America's goals and its fitness as a role model of democracy. "How do we think we can teach others how to run a country when we have so many problems here?'' he asked. 'We (Americans1 say we want to give that civiliiilfoit. for the most part, developed in the Middle East thousands of years ago, with no help from anyone. "Why should they give [their culture] up to become Europeanized?" he asked. He also raised the question of America's intents. Is the point to help "enlighten" those countries, or i thi a more subtle version of colonization? "Why shouldn't we?" he joked. "It's the American destiny to control the world." -+ Identifying the causes of writing anxiety -+ Managing writers -+ Moving beyond perfectionism, procrastination, and paralysis Refreshments wiU be provided. For more info .. 359-4506.


The Catal NEWS 2003 Fulbright scho ar rmocida to teach Students offer support to women-at health clinic Katelyn Weissinger Fourth-year Jennifer Arrnocida from page 1 is one of three ew College tudent who won a Fulbright group often smiled and said It's your right," as Fellowship this year. The award women entered the Center. will allow the Literature major to The similarities between each group's approach teach English at a high school in and method ended here. Germany next year. Armocida i New College students held homemade banners one of about 1,000 Fulbright bearing slogans such as "Honk if You're Pro-Choice" cholars awarded internationally as they greeted people entering the Center and struck this year and one of two New dramatic poses and gyrated their hips playfully before College Fulbright winners traveling ongoing traffic. to Germany. Before departing, The pro-life activists held up large, professionally Arrnocida will present a thesis on made color banners bearing photographs of aborted the book Patterns of Childhood by fetuses. Some participants loudly read passages from Christa Wolf. the Bible denouncing those who showed indifference Armocida will spend twelve towards the plight of the powerless. hours a week working as an 'We're very unsophisticated compared to them," assistant to an English teacher. She FMLA and Vox member first-year Charis Stiles said. hopes to go to Berlin, where she "They have huge signs of mutilated children, and studied German last mnmer. She pamphlets, and everything prepared, and t:Wngs that spent a month in Berlin through a they've been saying to people for fifteen years, and language program at the Free courtesy we just have signs we made that morning saying 'ProUniversity. Choice.' I feel on a social level we're more prepared, Jennifer Armocida will teach English in Germany next year. b th d d d d 11 d d Armocida began taking German ecause ey re ru e an ern e an JUSt ye an on t classes with Professor Glenn She's not proficient in German, but to get along just fine. make good arguments and say incredibly horrible Cuomo when she came to New Armocida, from Dayton, Ohio, she is self-conscious about being an things." College. Armocida is slightly is excited about the possibility of American in a country with strong Other New College students had similar worried about the language barrier; returning to a big city like Berlin. anti-American feelings. sentiments regarding the pro-life protestors. S is also looking forward to .... "[The mother seeking an abortion] already knows supposed to be teaching them English, so within that Sphere it should be okay," said Armocida. Armocida hopes to discuss American current events, politics, and culture with her new students. She also wants her students to do some creative writing, which she believes is under-taught in European high schools. Armocida plans to attend graduate school after returning from Germany i j a c in.tbe teeth "[The food in Germany] was answer me in English because they for her for [the pro-life protestors] to 9e screaming at great. I'm a vegetarian so I didn't could tell I was an American," said her at that point," Johnson said. "She already knows eat any of the weird sausage Armocida. "I remember this man the options and she's decided against them." concoctions ... I basically ate bread from Iraq came up to us--I was Pro-life protestor J.L. Jackson expressed what and cheese, but it was the best with a group of Americans-! many of her compatriots felt was a lack of infonnation bread and cheese ever," said remember him and a lot of German regarding the consequences of abortion. Armocida. "The people were people asking, 'Why are you doing ''Nobody ever tells what (the women who get reserved at first, and I like that this?' or 'Why do you have that abortions] are going to have to deal with afterwards," about their culture because I'm president?' I didn't know they Jackson said. "Nobody tells them about the emotional reserved at first, too." would see me like that but I don't pain, and the counseling necessary afterward. A lot of Although Armocida is think they necessarily saw me as them are young, unmarried, and don't feel like they enthusiastic about going abroad, responsible for America." have a choice." What will YOU do +AIRPORT+ SUIDIDeril e'll help vou make plans! FREE resume/CV writing consultations. Career planning. Job search strategies. Jobs. Mock interviews. Study .abroad. Graduate schools. Fellowships. Scholarships. Volunteer programs. Summer activities. 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The Catal st NEWS Any way you slice it, Heiser takes the cake Heiser last week, at appreciation ceremony in Heiser searching for New College's pennanent President. his honor. He chaired the search cornmiHee for almost two years. Heiser the patriot. Before New College, the General served as Anny Chief of Staff in Europe under Gen. Alexander Haig. Heiser's bronze gree1s students and visitors to the natural sci ence complex named after him. I continued from page 1 official capacity on campus, General Heiser brought a real human dimension to his role on this campus. I think we have taken that for granted," President Gordon Michalson Heiser's reach extended far beyond the New College community. "The one thing that I wish students would do as well, is not just thank him for what he did for New College, but thank him for what he did for this country as well," Blaweiss said. A monumental moment in New College history 'The retirement of General Heiser is a tremendous loss. You can only think of this as a monumental moment in the history of the college," Michalson said. Nevertheless, the New College Foundation is embracing change,and trying to take the Foundation in a new direction. 'The needs of the college are increasing, the complexity of the environment is growing. I think we have to be flexible and not just lock into something. On the other hand, the function of the Foundation is to raise money to enable New College to fulfill it's mission. To provide the where with all, that comes first and foremost, but how you do that, where you do that and with whom you do that should be open for all sorts of creative interpretation," Foundation Trustee John Cranor ill said. "We couldn't have had a better advocate. I think his advocacy role and that rock-solid person who has been here throu h thick and diin is w at his legacy is all about." New College President Gordon "Mike" Michals on ''My advice for New College is to keep progressing in the academic world and continuing to build our academic reputation,," Heiser said. He believes the Foundation should have a crucial role in this process by providing private funds to the coJlege over and above the state, which can be used for enhancement In the hands of Cranor and Foundation Executive Vice President Jim Harman the New College Foundation hopes to "stay the course" by supporting the enhancement of New College as much as possible. What about Heiser's future plans? ''I guess I am looking up to not getting up early every morning," he told The Catalyst. Looking for big feet "I have gotten into the habit of saying that we are not going to replace General Heiser [as Foundation President] for the simple fact that he is irreplaceable," Michalson said. While the administration acknowledges the retirement of Heiser is a "tremendous loss," they are quick to point out their optimism toward finding a successor. The search process for a new Foundation President and CEO is underway and expected to be completed by May 15. The search committee overseeing the process consists of Cranor, Harman, and Vice-President for Finance and Administration John Martin. ''It would be an honor for anyone in this country to come lead that foundation and raise money for this place," Blaweiss said. The committee placed an advertisement in the Chronicle of Higher Education, The Chronicle of Philanthropy and the Wall Street Journal. So far they have received over 190 applications for the position. Cranor believes the overwhelming response stems from the "public/private partnership that just does not exist anywhere else. This is a very unique situation." The committee is reviewing each application in order to create a short list of 12 candidates to present to the 10-member Thursday. This Jist will be narrowed to a short-short list of two to four candidates, who in turn will be invited to campus for an extensive 24-hour interview process. The final candidate will become Foundation president on July l. In the meantime, Harman will temporarily assume the position. "I think there are some wonderful opportunities here and some great challenges, no doubt about that. I really am looking forward to my role, no matter how brief it might be," he said. After a permanent president is selected Harman will return to his former role as vice-president. In selecting a new Foundation characteristics that tbe comniittee will take into consideration. 'They have to have an intellectual leadership capacity, creativity, ability to raise money, bias for action and the ability to interact with different constituents. 'Those are the basic qualities for which we are looking," Cranor said. "I am only looking for people with big feet because they will have big shoes to fill." photos tltis page b) athaniel Burt>ank : CoU ge FoundatiOn Heiser attended more than a few groundbreaking cere monies on the New College campus. Most recently, he helped kick off the new Keating Center. Left to right: Board of Tnl!.tees Chair Bob Johnson, Heiser, benefactors Ed and Elaine Keating, and President Gordon Michalson.


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Catal st Master Plan update: Environmentalists shouldn't be bureaucrats Michael Sanderson OPINIO N The New College Master Plan, as depicted in the e-mail announcement of March 7, sounded so reasonable it seemed safe to tune out the process. The placement of buildings and sidewalks seemed obvious, an "emerging consensus" unworthy of debate. Yet this plan does not just concern itself with the of buildings and sidewalks. This plan concerns itself with controlling the behavior of students with an almost deluded sense of why people make the choices they do, particularly the choice to drive instead of walk. With language that resembles a 1970s utopian environmentalist government planning guide, it articulates some strange policies for the future of New College: For a campus of one-fifth of one square mile, it endorses the idea of a shuttle-bus sys t em. To be fair shuttle buses might become necessary when New College require s students (only) to park in off-campus parking lots, or only on th e eas t s ide of campu s .. (This is in Section 11, "Transportation Element.") When different lots are set up as '' parking zones," we could have a premium rate for parking on campus. Parking fees are planned to increase regardless, to a rate "designed to make other modes of travel more economical." One thing I am sure coming to New College is the more I learn, the less 1 know. My substantial experience in the "real world" has fed me we1l, and provided my children with the designer sneakers and the automobiles they required. but it does not serve me weU as a cognitive being. We were talking in Developmental Psychology about crack babies, heroin babies, and babies with Acute Alcohol Syndrome. Should these mothers be prosecuted? The mother has continued to pursue her hedonic activities while eating, sleeping and eliminating for two. Her irresponsible actions result in a low birth weight baby that must experience withdrawal from the drugs she has continued t<> take. and will probably have cognitive challenges for life. Many will have physical deformities and handicaps, and most will be a burden on society their entire lives. So don't these The high parking fees are annoying but maintaining a car involves considerably more expense. If students choose to incur such expense, it seems fair to assume there are good reasons to do so, such as an off-campus job or life. This plan would, in effect, discourage that as well. Someoneand it' s now at the level of the New College Board The key phrase occurs in Section 3, Never mind that the path to College Objective 4 : "Service and pedestrian Drive is a sun-baked, monotonous half functions will be separated to the mile stretch, or the north-south route a greatest extent possible." This equates two-lane road with no sidewalk (the everyone arriving on campus by car plan calls for alleviating these with service functions problems). When students choose the Regarding the landscaping, the plan more pleasant option, the thing to do is simply states, "The west campus restrict their options. In the charge of service drive should be designed to improving the New College blend into the landscape." For a experience. Crouched in the language of long-tenn parking needs, a concern that students live proper, environmentally-conscious lifestyles. Crouched in the language of long term parking needs lurks the aforementioned concern that students live proper, environmentally-conscious lifestyles. This paternalistic social engineering received its most searing critique by social critic Joan Didion in her 1976 essay "Bureaucrats." Reprinted in The White Album, it chronicles the delusional effort of transit officials to change Southern California culture, "to pry people out of their cars." The critique resonates when confronting a Master Plan that seems to deny its students live in Florida. of Trustees-must recognize that New College should not plan to create hardship in order to sufficiently annoy students into living an environmentally-conscious lifestyle. Unfortunately, cars are not a luxury in modern American life, and if the plan aims to make their owners miserable, it will further degrade campus life. Not just for students but for everyone elsefaculty staff administrators, t r ustees, visitors, moment I wondered what "service drive" to which it is referring. That characterization of the road may interest the New College Foundation, which has to entertain donors arriving by car and last year spent $50,000 to plant flowers at the entrance to College Drive, in what it called "The Front None of this means to criticize the goal of getting more people out of their car s, but the way to do that i s to make campu s m or e ple as ant for p e de s tri a ns, not more unple as ant for drivers. In the M aster Plan, we must (to start) strike Door Project. p r o spec tive stude n t s, and the The Mas ter Plan desperately needs an affirma tio n tha t c ampus s hould be pleas ant for everyone those people w h o drive, those who walk and those undiscu ed cent stud nts dobo Obviously, the plan doesn't and shuttle buses; the administration explicitly bash those people who drive must rush plans for shade trees, cars, with one exception: students who sidewalks, and the best big idea in the live on campus and drive to class. To plan: A plaza where travel by foot and rebuke them, the plan is content to bike converge, now site of a valuable make the experience of driving on but replaceable parking lot, facing the who Jive off-campus. Take the ugly view of the rears of buildings on College Drive, the road to our most important buildings. Most of us probably think it resulted from poor planning. Yet the ugly view is deliberate. campus unpleasant for all. syrnbohc, now-useless arch. actions at the very least constitute assault and battery? The purpose of this letter is to address a cartoon that appeared in The Catalyst a few weeks ago that has been grating on my conscious. It depicted a human fetus as an extremely stupid looking fish like being, and the caption claimed the cartoon character had eaten more intelligent things on a bun. My t1rst reaction was to think about what I have learned in my psychology intelligence. Fewer sc1entlfic mmds consider IQ tests as a real measure for intelligence every day. Some believe that adaptation and success in one's environment is a good measure of intelligence. In that light, a fetus is a remarkably intelligent being. programmed genetically to grow and differentiate into a person that may one day attend New College. The thing I am most sure of is that I am not smart enough or v ... .... .... enough to know what is about abottion. I do not offer an opinion for that very reason. But I take exception at cavalier treatment and assumption by most that the right thing is a gone conclusion. Some may claim the cartoon in The that was only a joke,'' but isn't rooted in an unexpected treatment truth or opinion? The seemed an appeal to a baser sense humor that bas no place in a publication of an esteemed college, even a very 1 iberal liberal college. I know that almost every at this college supports abortion as woman's right to control her body, and I have no problem that. Nor do I have the n .. n,rv>rl equipment to have a personal stake, included the question of treatment of drug addicts who children to suggest that most of time, things are not as simple as seem. I do think .the gentleman wrote the cartoon needs to the intelligence level of his humor a notch. Announcement from the President snJDENT SURVEY ROUND-UP! Your responses will affect NCFs future. Please return your survey fom1s today! 1st Year Student$: College Student Report (NSSE Survey) Your First College Year Survey (YFCY Survey) 4th Year Students: College Student Report (NSSE Survey) Baccalaureate Student Audit Baccalaureate Student Survey Call Jackie Bethune in the President's Office if you have lost or misplaced your (359-4421 or ' Your response has impact! Speak Out! Have a different opinion? Tell us! Phone: 359-4266 Email: Snail Mail: Box 75


--' ---...... --The Catalyst FEATURES April 23, 2003 Resident Advisor selections a bunch of real ''Survivors'' by Sarah Stamper They set out on a four-week mission to outwit, outplay and outlast. They endured excruci ating trials, such as an inter view with the housing staff, playing with tinkertoys and decorating a sheet of notebook paper. They are the 13 sur vivors of.the Resident Advisor selection process. Instead of winning a million dollars like the survivors on CBS' hit show, however, they will endure a year of: "I locked myself out of my room," "I think that I am going to throw up," and "What do I do when my ex is stalking me?" What exactly does it take to be selected for this prestigious position? Chair of the RA Se lection Committee and thesis student RA Maggie Phillips said, the committee was "not looking for someone who would be a 'Super RA.' We were looking for people who had the balance of personality d kills to be one-fifteenth of the team." The group of RAs will soon be split into several tribes to be designated as "Allasbrokenie" (Dortstein), "Nowahotwatera" (Pei), "Hermitavilla" (Viking), "Landohippies" (B Dorm). RAs will not know their spe cific room assignments until af ter they have completed their spring training, but the Office of Residence Life has released a tentative list. Members of the Dortstein tribe are Casey "kill them all and let God sort them out" Bums, Eric "the Sos" Sosnoff, Melissa Richardson, Claire Richardson, and Ben Wright. As first-year Claire Richardson said, "We are looking forward to getting paid to ask everyone how their day is going." On the other hand, second-year Casey Bums said he was more inter ested in the "gossip." Don't give up hope for this tribe yet. Third-year and current RA Eric Sosnoff has plenty of "divinely revealed" programs in store for his residents. Be careful though, this team may not be as solid and com mitted as they appear on the surface. Bums admitted if he were ever faced with starvation he would "eat Ben Wright. He is 100 percent certified organic, no chemicals added, and he The Nowahotwatera tribe is slated to be Marina Williams, Ian "Who the Hell is this Guy" Thomas, Justin Vickers, Emma Jay, Zeeshan ''Z-Man" Hafeez, Tim Gomez, Veronica "Vern" Fannin and Brian "the answer" Ellison. This group of RAs is look ing forward to living in a Pei single. Second-year Brian Elli son is currently spending his free time contemplating ideas about overcoming the loneli ness he may feel next year after parting ways with two-year roommate Vickers. He said he plans on video-streaming the room to the internet. "That way millions of well-paying per verts can take part in my expe rience," he said. This tribe also has several ideas for programming, includ ing "car washes featuring Snoop Dogg, and Jive bands," said Fannin. Even though this will be her second year as an RA, Fannin claims she never gets tired of "the looks on peo ple's faces when they come to ask for condoms." Pei RA Hafeez has a differ ent view for how to keep his It is imperative that RAs be responsible. Justin Vickers (who promises to be available fuJiwtime) and Zeeshan Hafeel: (who is very, very sorry) understand .::;;,. ___ __,this completely. ze""e._s ...... h-an_H_a ..... fee___.z residents happy. He said, "We will start a fratority, for both males and females, similar to a fraternity or sorority." This is interesting considering that his main tum-off is "New College Women." Jay plans on passing the time by "being a crazy thesis student who acts so ridicu lously that it makes residents laugh and question, 'Is Emma Jay OK?"' she said. Thomas is also looking for ward to some crazy behavior, although in another sense. He laughed and said, "next year, The Wellness Unit will have a Friendly RA" Emma Jay will spend her fourth year at New College, and her second as RA. in 1st Court. lan "Guapo" Thomas wants to get to know fellow Pei RA Brian Ellison "in the biblical sense Conversely Ellison wants to eat Thomas heart since it would endow him with new astronomiPei: lan "Guapo" Thomas Brian Ellison Justm Vickers Emma Jay Veronica Fannin '"------' cal sexual powers." Ellison Zeeshan Hafeez Marina Williams Melissa "Tim" Gomez B-Dorm: Anna Perlmutter Gabriel DeFazio Oortstein: Claire Richardson Casey Burns Eric Sosnoff Melissa Richardson Ben Wright Viking: Jessica Mazza every student will wish they were a first-year again!" First-year Gabriel DeFazio and third-year Anna Perlmutter will make up the Landohippies tribe. In his first year as an RA, Defazio requested to live in B dorm because, "Shoot. I don't know," he said. DeFazio is preparing for his role as an RA by "listening to these tapes while I sleep that say, 'my work for my residents will be an honor, not a sacrifice," he said. In her spare time at B dorm, Perlmutter plans on "lis tening to see how many phone conversations I can hear through the walls." If the going ever got tough over in B-dorrn Perlmutter would solve the problem by "eating Gabriel be cause he has manly forearms," she said. Third-year Jessica "Virgin Mary" Mazza will be the sole survivor in charge of the Her mitavilla tribe. When he t ld her mom about her RA duties she said her mom aid,. virgin handing out condoms, that is ridiculous! While on the topic of sex, Mazza said she is completely turned off by Eric Sosnoff, drunk men, rap music and Marriott food. She is most looking forward to "partying at the Ramada, urn, I mean, help ing my residents," she said. In preparation for their role as next year's RAs, each per son selected an item that was most important to them and New College. Chocolate, toilet paper, vibrators, Mark Blaweiss, sunscreen, condoms, soap, inflatable toys and Presi dent Gordon "Mike" Michal son were all among the most valued assets. To show that the RAs will have the residents' best inter ests at heart next year they of fered to make the following sacrifices if necessary. If there were another shortage of toilet paper, as there was this year, the RAs would be willing to tolerate using the fronds of Palm Court palm trees to avoid having dissatisfied residents. They would also go to such lengths as skinning a sheep to make condoms in the middle of the night if a fellow Novo Col legian was on a journey of self discovery and needed them. So rest assured New College, it looks !ike we will be in reason-

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